I have written here before about being a professional paleontologist. As such, I have to say I was not enthusiastically looking forward to the newest installment of the Jurassic Park franchise, Jurassic World. In fact, I expected to hate it.
From the previews the story line was hinted at: another park with dinosaurs, many unrealistic reconstructions of the fossil animals they were supposed to portray, a new genetically engineered dinosaur, and packs of raptors being led against the new bad dino by a motorcycle-riding hero (a paleontologist, we thought surely). Oh boy, we thought collectively. A “paleontologist” leading a pack of trained raptors against other dinosaurs to defend humanity. Proving to doubters that his rag-tag team of raptors could be led and become the heroes he knew them to be. What a cliché and a stinker of a movie this will be.
But I went, as I knew I had to be culturally literate about what 10 year olds would be asking me for the next dozen years. Things like, what will it be like to be the alpha raptor?
And to my surprise, I didn’t hate the movie. I actually liked it. Here is why: there is not a single paleontologist in the entire thing!
This movie took strides to move away from the science of paleontology altogether. Sure, the park has big dinosaurs, but none of the dinosaurs they created were “real.” Even in the original park, they pointed out, all the dinosaurs had additional genetics to make them viable animals, so they were always facsimiles of dinosaurs anyway. And now in Jurassic World they are going all out and creating attractions, not reality.
In the past Jurassic Park movies to one degree or another there was an attempt to conform to current knowledge of dinosaur biology. And by walking the line between science and movie making they repeatedly failed to satisfy the picky scientists. “Velociraptor was not that big.” “Most of the dinosaurs are from the Cretaceous, not the Jurassic.” “The T. rex should have feathers, why didn’t they put feathers on them!”
But in Jurassic World they didn’t need a single cartoonish paleontologist character to advise them on how the animals looked or behaved (“She cannot see you if you don’t move.” Yeah, right), or espousing the latest dinosaur lore. It is as if the movie makers were saying “Get off our backs you paleontologists!”
There is no real pretense to be scientific. Hybrid dinosaurs? We are just making them up as attractions, so no problem. Using packs of dinosaurs led by a human against other dinosaurs. Sure, why not. The evil characters were the marketers and the genetic engineers making things up for profit, and the ever-present corporation looking to weaponize something. No paleontologists needed.
And Chris Pratt’s character, Owen Grady, the one who looked suspiciously like the love child between Indiana Jones and, well, a paleontologist version of Indiana Jones…not a paleontologist. OK fine, he can train all the wild animals he wants to.
The franchise may never die, and now they can continue to make thrilling movies with spectacular special effects unrestricted by scientific sour grapes. They can concoct all the crazy, wild, mean, giant critters they want, and I for one will not get a professional (dinosaur) feather ruffled. Just don’t pretend that they represent real prehistoric critters.
Finally, paleontologists have been freed from “the Park.”
*I cannot help myself. Mosasaurs were not that big, and pterosaurs could not have carried off full grown women. There, I said it.